This is me, before they destroyed my life. Girls beside me are coursemates, but my guess is no one is interested who they are. I only met they there coincidentally.
Thats me after they destroyed my life. Its my back view coz my face looks so grouchy, I'm afraid someone would take my pic to be the scary ghost pic your get in your email. I hate those mails. Tells you to find the difference in two pictures or something and when u are concentrating so hard, a ghost face appears and refuses to go off your screen.
The highlights are supposed to be ash brown, but it turns out GOLD. I will not be surprised if within the next three days I get beaten up thrice and asked to join a gang.
The highlights are too damn THICK.
Haiz...
On a happier note, I keep meeting Eileen nowadays.
The girl beside me is Xiuling, Eileen's best friend.
She just showed me two very interesting lovegetys.
"Huh, whats wrong leh?", you ask.
Ok, first, the guy in both prints is the same person.
And then look at the dates.
Alvin (the same guy who brought me Nigel *refer to previous entry) is Xiuling's bf. He was with her for more than 2 years.
He is also stupid.
One fine day, Xiuling read some msg about how some girl (who named herself Kitty) misses Alvin and stuff. I forgot exactly how, but I think Xiuling stole her number and called the girl's home, and started to talk to the girl's mum.
The girl's mum confirmed that her daughter was attached to Alvin currently, and sent Xiuling a scanned version of the lovegety the adulterous couple took. How sweetly scandalous.
Xiuling arranged to meet up with the girl and gave her all sorts of evidence that she and Alvin was an item when he was with her, so obviously that night the girl got very angry with Alvin and started to make a big fuss.
Alvin got very angry with Xiuling, and guess what he said?
Something like: "I am really in love with her. I love her more than I would ever love you. Can you please allow us to be together? Please, tell her that you have been lying to her. Tell her that you are actually just a crazy person cooking up stories about us being together. Tell her you are actually the third party!"
Of course Xiuling plain refused to help him (duh! How ridiculous can a person get) but anyway, it seems like "Kitty" the Naive believed his bullshit coz they still got together or something.
Xiuling found THREE empty condom wrappers in his wallet.
You guys know what I am gonna say right? Kitty is fucking ugly and I dun understand how he can actually shag her. Xiuling said that Kitty looks actually pretty in the lovegety. She is uglier in real life. Ah well, at least she managed to convince Atrocious Alvin to leave Xiuling for her. Not bad, I say.
Back to less scandalous topics.
The Aftermath
Lets see what happened to the three guys who came to ask for my number.
1) Eric
Poor Eric happens to have a private line. Now that fact is particularly saddening for him because Jem has a private line as well.
As it is, I am already irritated whenever he calls, just because its him.
To add cyanide to the poison, I am double irritated coz everytime I would think its Jeremy calling me and I would be so disappointed it is him.
3 times he called with me sounding damn happy at first and then suddenly have the passion of a slug when I hear his whiny voice instead of Jeremy's deep one.
On the 3rd time, I cruelly told him that I always thought it was the guy whom I like that called me whenever he calls.
"Oh, like that ah. Then I wouldn't call you ever again lor."
"Huh siao, why." *Whoops and hops around in joy*
"Coz you got someone that you liked already what."
"You are damn superficial lor! You mean I like someone then u cannot contact me liao meh? Cannot just be friends ah? Must be together one meh?"
"But I like you what..."
"Siao you didnt even talk to me for more than an hour, how can u conclude that you like me?"
*irrelevance alert* "Hiyah next time I dun call you liao lar."
"Fine." *slams the phone*
Good riddence, Eric the Greasy Mechanic.
2) Henry
After me not replying his second sms which asked me whether I have a bf and whether I go clubbing, Mr Henry very cleverly bombarded me with "Are you there?"s
At least 3 "are you there?"s I ignored.
Now, how are you supposed to answer that question? Its a stupid, stupid thing to ask people, coz if they can see it, they would surely (if they bothered), have replied. If they are "not there", they cannot see it anyway.
Wheres the "there" you are referring to anyway? Beside my phone? What the.
I didnt reply and he stopped msging me for one day, and suddenly I received this msg:
"Are you going clubbing tonight? Are you open-minded?"
Kan.
Ni.
Na.
Must be an IRC PERVERT!
*shudders*
3) James
Yet another James, but this one can't be more different from the James whose site is in my links.
His first message turned me off immediately and I did not reply after that.
Hi windy, I am james and this is my number."
Wah lau, why do I keep attracting stupid people!
TELL ME!!!!!!! WHY??? WHY ME??? WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS!!! I HATE STUPID PEOPLE! WILL THEY STOP BOTHERING ME!!! URRRGHHH!!
I am so irritated.
I'm irritated by something else.
Everybody keeps asking me for my height.
Look, its personal k. Yes, I'm short. Extremely short. SO? If you see a girl with extreme big boobs you dun go ask her for her cup size. You see a wrinkled old man who looks like he came in the same boat as Sang Nila Utama but you dun go up to him and say, "God you look like you came in the same boat as Sang Nila Utama! How old, I mean, ancient are you exactly?"
No, you don't do that. So its rude to ask me for my height.
I have thought of the perfect response when guys ask me for my height.
"Woah, you sure are short!"
"Yeah, I noticed it for a lots of years. I was hoping you won't have noticed though, how queer that u did. Is it very obvious? Oh gosh I think I feel sad."
"How short are you exactly?"
"I'm not saying."
"Come on...."
"Tell me your penis size and I will tell you my height."
With this sentence, there could be two responses.
RESPONSE ONE:
"Siao, my penis size is personal lar crazy."
"So is my height."
"Well, penis cannot see but height can see mah."
"If you can see it why still want to ask about it? Can't you judge yourself?"
"Wah lau. I guess 132cm. Correct?"
"You may guess all you want, but you will never have the pleasure of knowing you are correct."
"Okok. But how I know my penis size, I never go measure la... You think I pervert."
"I never measure my height also. It depresses me. Lets drop the topic, or I shall cry."
"...."
RESPONSE TWO:
"My penis size is 21 cm the last time I measured. It is actually the width of an A4 size paper."
"Yeah ok my height is 1.78m."
"Wah lau. My penis really 21 cm lar... U think I fake you meh..."
"I never fake you also. Its just that, like you, I have vivid imaginations."
"...."
*****
OK what about when GIRLS ask me for my height?
"hey what your height?"
"Haha.. Oh yeah! I wanted to show you! I like this guy called Jeremy right, and he worked with me at Singtel shop that time... He damn cute you know! I got his pic in my phone, you wanna see?
"Oh really! How old is he?"
"Blah blah"
Yup, I think I am quite capable of protecting myself from ever being forced to reveal my height again.
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